Following recent cases in which women with greatly enlarged lips have claimed to be unable to blow into the standard breathalyser tube, Danish manufacturer DrikSnuse has launched a special mouthpiece to overcome the excuse.
The single-use SN-150 silicone mouthpiece pushes onto a standard breathalyser tube and is claimed to be large enough to accommodate the majority of enhanced lip sizes, from a modest LP4 (usually referred to as a ‘Colchester quickie’) right up to the Hollywood-shocking LP98.
Essex traffic officer PC Jason Pullover told Spoofflé: ‘We’re getting a lot of funny excuses these days, you know, like “I have a throat disorder and can only suck, not blow” and a real corker on Monday night from a bloke who claimed he was a human rights lawyer: “My breath belongs to me so you can’t have it.” Then his trousers fell down and he collapsed.’
The new mouthpiece (referred to in the traffic unit as a ‘Trout Pouch’) will be rolled out across the UK’s 43 police forces in good time for Christmas.